E-Mail from HIM

I checked my Hotmail account this morning in chapel. I checked my Junk folder and there was a shocking sender. You won't believe who it was. It was him. Yes, him. He didn't say anything in it. He had only sent a picture of Sasuke and Sakura and in the subject line wrote "Picture that you might like." I saw that it was sent on the twelfth.

When I saw that he had e-mailed me, I was like, What the heck! When I read the subject line, I was once again like, Let me guess, he sent me a photo of him and his girlfriend. When I saw the picture, I was so shocked. I was, yet again, like, Why in the world did he send me a photo of Sasuke and Sakura? Why does he remember that I like them?

No, I did not respond to him or anything. I do not plan on doing it. Heck, I do not even plan on talking to him at all. I figure that if one day, when I am at home alone and he comes over to give us a wedding invitation for his marriage with his girlfriend, I will bow to him like they do in all of the Korean dramas I have watched so far and I will not say a word. Why should I treat him as an old friend by talking to him like friends do? We have never been friends and we will never be friends. Heck, there was never a relationship between us and there never will be any type of relationship. This is what I will do: Speak when asked to and bow to him.

Why Don't They Just Drop Dead?

Yesterday, to put it in simple terms, SUCKED!

I got home after school and Dad was on the phone with Uncle David. After I came out of the bathroom and he was off of the phone, I was like, "Let me guess... We have to work." And he said that we had to. That set me off. I started crying.

Okay, it's not about working, it's more about the day we have to work. April 21st. That is the day of graduation rehearsal and, on top of that, Blue Man Group. Okay, here I am, again crying.

To put it simply, it got hellish in here: I yelled at him, he yelled at me, he yelled at Mom, Mom yelled at him, he broke things, I threw things...

Mom and I talked when she drove to the laundry mat and we both agreed that he doesn't have the balls to tell his stupid brother no. Then, around seven or eight last night, when I was wanting the key so that I could go to school for the entire night to get away from everybody and do homework while there, I told Mom, yet again, directly in front of Dad that he chooses his brother over his own family!

And that's true. It's always been about Uncle David. When has it ever been about one of us? NEVER!! And that just irks me off to no extent.

So, in the end, I wasted $188 on him to buy Blue Man Group tickets. So now, I am probably going to sell them or something that way the tickets don't go to waste. So, on the day right before my graduation and after graduation rehearsal, I have to work. All because my stupid, idiotic, f***ing, so-called "father" chooses his own brother over me.

And we were going to celebrate my graduating and him liking Blue Man Group by going to see Blue Man Group.

I just wish that both of my so-called "parents" would DROP DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Three Things, One Post

First of all, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I know that I am late on the Christmas post and the New Year post. But still...

Number One: For Christmas, I got an external hard drive for my computer, a Christmas bear, and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2. Of course, when I saw Harry, I screamed. Why? Because I love Harry oh so much to no extent that I am not even putting in any punctuation marks because this can be like one entire sentence and I don't think I can stop any time soon because this is how much I love Harry - Okay, Jamie! Chill! Sorry.

Anyway, when Sarah opened up one of her presents, she was like, "Oh, my God!" It was a calendar of Marilyn Monroe whom she loves most of all. When Mom opened her present of two coloring books and a box of crayons, she cried because Grandma Carol always colored. Garan (Sarah's current boyfriend and who was spending Christmas with us) did not know why Mom was crying and so Sarah whispered the reason why to him. And when Mom opened up her big present of a Paula Deen cooking set, Mom nearly screamed. When Dad opened up his present of Blue Man Group tickets, if I recall, he was shocked or amazed or something to that extent. I would have to watch the video of everyone's reactions to their presents.

Number Two: New Year's wasn't much. When the fireworks were going off in the area on New Year's Eve and going off at Amish Acres to start the New Year, Peyton was going off. Mom took Indie outside along with Dad and me. I think Indie froze because her hair was medium length and the fact that it was around freezing outside. Other than that, not much.

Number Three: He came over today. Actually, it would be yesterday since I started writing this after the clock turned for the second day of the New Year. So, if I say "today," I mean "yesterday." I think you get what I mean. So, anyway, when Mom got home after work, Dad and she talked about him. At one point, I heard Dad say that he is trying to save up money to buy his girlfriend a ring and ask her to marry him. I heard that and I was like, No. That can't be happening. I'm sorry. Give me a moment. I'm sorry. I just had to spend three or four minutes crying. When I thought about it three or four, maybe five, hours ago, I thought, Now that he's going to be getting married, I will certainly be the last person in our graduating class to be married. Heck, I'm probably the only one that is not in a relationship. No, scratch that. The only one that has never been in a relationship.

I wish that I never heard that. I wish that he would be waiting for me. But these are only false hopes.

Here are two songs I feel fits how I feel right now: "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt and "Soulmate" by Natasha Bedingfield. I think Bonnie's fits just perfect. But... Yeah.